Now what??!!

Music can be full of surprises & so can life!! Just like you don't know what the next movement of a symphony will bring unless you have heard it before life is very similar. One moment everything is calm, serene & beautiful the next it is complicated, dissonent & painful. Yes-even music can be painful!! When all the notes are very close together, when there is a lot of percussion banging thru the melody these can be painful moments in otherwise beautiful music. Lately there has been a lot of minor sounds in the music of my life. Pain brings a lot of minor music in my life lately. I crave the quiet, major chords-the beautiful little melody that calms the soul but lately that melody is silent. All I can hear is the loud, minor sound of my pain. There has been very little physical music in my life lately& I miss it!! I haven't played the piano in over 2 weeks & I can tell. My soul is heavy, there are frequent tears & a constant unsettled feeling. My soul craves it's music!! I miss my music!! It is time that the mourning end!! It is time to move on!! Debussey is calling me!! Scales & arleggioes are calling me!! My fingers crave the movement!! My brain craves the emotion, the desire, the love of the music!! It is time!! It is time to set aside the pain & experience the joy of music again!!

How do I descfibe work last night?

I thought this was going go be something easy to do-maybe I was wrong? What music or musical term can I use to describe frustration, anger, happiness...? Well-let's give this a try!! With so many emotions at 1 time it might have to be a symphony!! The 1st movement of the symphony would be allegro(fast), maybe in a minor mode to indicate sadness with lots of accidentals to make it sound very confusing & needs to change keys every other measure to increase theconfusion!! The 2nd movement would be even faster-maybe vivace & have lots of 16th & 32nd notes-that would really upset the player!! The last movement would be dolce-very pleasant & sweet. It would have a wonderful melody that you remember very easily & hum to yourself for many days. It would bring smiles to the faces of those listening. This melody would be played by the flute of course!! And would have a beautiful piano accompaning it. Then it would have more instuments added 1 by 1 & would swell & swell until the sound fills the auditorium & spills out to the street. This melody would just raise your spirits more & more until you just couldn't help but smile. All of the angry, fast music would be in the past & a distant memory because this new melody would fill your mind & soul. This is the outside part of music.

Does that sound like fiction? Sometimes it feels like it is-today it feels like it is but I know that isn't true. I know that the inside part of music comes from inside of me. Just as the outside symphony music changed & replaced the anger w/ happiness & contentment so I must choose to let go of the anger & frustration caused by others. I am responsible for my reactions & behavior. So for the inside music I will choose to be happy & contented with where I am right now. I want that happy music to show thru. I want to be known by my "dolce music" & not by all the minor, angry, unhappy music that can be caused by others.

Introduction

Every piece of music begins with an introduction so why shouldn't this begin the same way? So-here goes!! I have always had a love of music. I think that I have always wanted to study music but I haven't had time until recently. There were many things that interfered with my study of music-marriage, raising children, divorce, work-life in general. But now my children are grown, Iam empty nesting. I love what I do at work & have no desire to advance any further. I started my study of music 18 months ago by taking piano lessons. Initially I wanted to take lessons to learn exercised to help with the weakness in my hands caused by my headaches. I wanted to keep my fine finger coordination. But it rapidly became more than that. It became a study of my life-a study of ME!! So I have decided to start a blog in order to keep a record of my thoughts, insights, etc. This is the beginning of my greatest adventure!!